at present when i am writing this post i am in a pathetic state
consumed by my fears and what not
1) i am not doing anything
2) i am tensed like hell
3) i am scared like hell
the whole sem as usual has gone in a jify and now is in less then a month and half i will be having my final exams out of which half a month will go in submissions and practical exams and other stuff
i am in a pathetic state as i haven't yet started studying and well nobody has yet i am tensed and worst of all text book of two subjects are yet to arrive
apart from all this i haven't thought about what will i do next. will it be MBA or CAT GRE GMAT GATE
will i get a job
am i even capable of working as an engg
heck i am and i have been good at programing right from my birth
i was meant to be a programmer
i am sick of not knowing what i have become after so much of studying and people not realizing my worth.
i sick of stupid grades and all the meaningless things happening around.
i am sick and tired of all the stupid soaps running on national television
the free time i get is either spent in getting tensed and crying or doing stupid things like gossip,t.v., computer, movies
and other times when i am in other places i constantly think about getting back to books
inspite of having so much of brains why do i still feel brainless
well the brighter side ofcourse is everything will workout fine.
after much deliberation and thinking and quite a bit of analyzing i conclude that
this situation is not worst
i can get through the tunnel with a bright smile on my face
and all the HR guys out there hope you guys can see that i surely make for that "potential employee" that you are looking for and if you can't see that then go ahead hire all those rote parrots and be happy
ok now life is beautiful and let me just zzrrroommmmm off.
will definitely blog in after i survive the volcano of my hurting head :)
byess and tatas
whoaaa...that was like a peek into an absolutely confused n cluttered mind! :)
ReplyDeletetake a break.. I never knew why I became an engineer at the first place but now I realize that everything in life happens for a reason.
ReplyDeleteDo get back to your study table ... concentrate and take a deeper look at your plans. You are good at whatever little or big you do with your heart, so let this also be included.
ReplyDeleteAll the best, and wish you loads of good luck and good wishes!
Ok .. poetry girl .. here is a beautiful poem, somewhat related to your dilemma. The last 2 lines are what inspires me at times .. hope this helps .. and don't be tense, all will be well .. :D ..
ReplyDeleteInvictus
(by William Ernest Henley; 1849-1903)
Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.
In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.
Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find me, unafraid.
It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate;
I am the captain of my soul.
ohh wow another (IT)engineer in the making..
ReplyDeletehey exams are so easy. u can study the night beofre;)